the author.

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

I sat by the bay window...
staring out at the sky...with my coffee in hand...
warm....with its texture - milky, velvety as i slid it down my throat...
Just the way I like it...

Such sorrows fills my heart.
But considering the hefty sorrows that fills my heart...
My mind and thoughts are at ease....
Praise to Allah.
And of course..listening to The Soulmate's voice helps....
That tinkling voice of his...I can always feel the smile in his voice...
Loving me...always always being there for me.......
Thank you, The Soulmate.

I hate being blamed for something I feel I didnt play a part in.
But sometimes, life puts you in the path of selfish people.
Or people who are self centered and can only see the faults of others.
Never theirs.

The old me would have apologized and then wallow in self-pity and regret.
For something I didn't even do.
Disgusting.

Now all I do is to reflect....and weigh the words of another as objectively as possible.
And sentence myself accordingly.....

It disheartens me when a party failed to see all that has been done or sacrificied js for that one being....What happens when someone keeps on taking...chiping away at every positive feelings that a person has towards that someone.

Why must it always happen to me.
Why do you always do that to me.
I wonder.
Will it ever end...will you ever learn to be more sensitive?
Ever.......................

You can tell me that you're sorry, but I don't believe it like I did before.
It's js a vast empty ocean, where you are.

Labels: regrets, sorrows, The Soulmate

x junn Chocolate Love Scribbles 11:54 PM x

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Monday, December 13, 2010

Days with Miki and Paul Coelho (ok fine I shall stop berangan-ing and say HIS BOOKS) were peaceful.

And I wish I could say that it feels good to be back but the only thing I loved about being back was my bed and of cos the loved ones and the kitties...
Seeing Tompok curled up in bed with Adik makes the heart swell like no other............

Anyway,year is coming to an end....
and 2011 is going to be the start of many many many new beginnings...
Can't seem to emphasize that enough....
It's overwhelming...but i know everything's gonna be alrite....
Insya'Allah....

So many changes...so many things to plan.....
but i shall hold on and persevere....and when it all ends...
I can look back and say....

I DID IT!

Ok, enough of looking towards the future...for now...
It's back to work.

Labels: beginnings, end year, love, new year

x junn Chocolate Love Scribbles 8:35 PM x

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Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Some people think I am bananas (read:crazy)

becos I wash my kitchen at least once every day.

I know it may seem weird...but it's therapeutic for me.
It's like when I wash the kitchen... 'everything' in my life becomes clean too...

As the water wash away all the grit and grime (though not many cos the irony is that I DON'T cook), I feel like it is sweeping away my childish fears/worries/whatever it is that's occupying my head away too.

A symbolism kind of thing if you get my drift.

So anyway, just thought I would share with you my 'findings' with regards to the VISA matters because honestly speaking...I found it to be such a chore finding information at first....

This should interest you if like me, you are planning to visit Indonesia (Bali in particular for me) and stay there for at least 2 months or longer...

It is this Visa called the SosBud visa...basically, it allows you to stay in Bali for 2 months and will allow you up to 4 renewals of 30 days. I guess this type of Visa is most ideal if you want to test the waters out first...before finally making a decision if you want to uproot there permanently/semi-permanently....

You will need to have these at hand in order to apply for it:

Passport must be valid more than six months.

Two clean passport pages for visa stamping.

One recent colour passport size photo. 3.5cmX4.5cm.

Sponsor letter addressed to the Indonesian embassy in Singapore.

Copy of your sponsor's KTP.

Yea, the catch is that you need to have an Indonesian sponsor.

But that's easy if you have relatives/friends living in Bali :)

Thereafter,you can say "Hello Bali."

So there.

All the information you need in 5 mins when I had to search for hours :S

Till next time.

Time to get back to work.

Labels: bali, goodbye, singapore, uproot, visa

x junn Chocolate Love Scribbles 5:36 PM x

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Thursday, November 18, 2010

Ok.
So recently, I have decided to don the hijab.
I've been thinking abt it for the longest time and suddenly...the timing js felt right...
Well...I'm slowly trying to make it a full-time time thing...
(Be kind, let me take 1 step at a time ok)

Though I do feel comfortable being out wearing the hijab esp when I am with my dearest Alshidiq already...
(ps: thank you sweetheart for always supporting me in whatever I want to do and whatever I believe in, I can't thank you enough...)

I have been doing my research and reading lotsa materials on why the hijab is a must for the ladies....and Insya'Allah...it will be a part of me (slowly building up on the shawls and what nots...ya lah am vain lah!) and spending $$ to buy more covered clothings but I would like to think that it is all for heading towards jalan Allah :)

And as I was talking to Nana the other day (thank you Na!)..she showed me this site owned by this really really exquisite and beautiful Hana Tajima...

Since I am really 'new to her" (eh, I have only known that she existed about 2 days ago, how ignorant of me...note to self: stop burying myself in books too much) , all I can say is that she is so so so effortlessly chic, stunning, pretty...and everything nice ok..

Alil introduction of her as found on her webbie at http://www.stylecovered.com/about/ though the condensed version goes something like this...

She is half-Japanese, half English and 100% Muslim...although she only embraced the faith about 4 years ago....

Pic credit: Hana Tajima http://www.stylecovered.com/

She is THAT beautiful lady in the red dress and let me tell you...the pieces that she designs...are just OH-SO-GORGEOUS.

Iamsoinlove soinlove, I repeat, soinlove...with her Kimono Wrap Maxi Dress...Her Swish Side Panel Maxi Skirt...(You can view it all at http://www.maysaa.com/)

She is such an inspiration.

Enuff said.

Labels: Hana Tajima, hijab, muslimah, new beginning

x junn Chocolate Love Scribbles 5:45 PM x

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Monday, November 15, 2010

Called ChikiDiq's home and talked to Muadz...

Me: Hello Mumu, Mumu buat apa?
M: Hello Aunty Juju, Muadz tengah minum Coke....

Pic of Mumu when he wanted to be a tong gas delivery man :)

That lil kid always make me laugh...
I have been spending oodles of my time over at ChikiDiq's place bcos the kids are there...
It makes me happy.....
When I reflected back on my life...last year..and the way it was this year...
I have nothing but praises for Allah...for giving me everything that I need...
Alhamdulillah.....

That's not to say that all is rosy in my life though...

If you have been following my blog, you would have realized that I suffer from bouts of dark periods in my life...

Sometimes it js comes, unannounced..triggered by idon'tknowwhat.

But I have been reading alot these days and I can't help but to feel silly afterwards....because there r so many people out there who r worse off than me...and the troubles that I face..are nothing compared to theirs.....

I guess I've got to work more on myself...

I want to be a better sister/friend/fiance/aunty/niece but most importantly...I want to work towards being a better Muslim....

Pray for me alrite.

Oh, and before I go...

I js had to post this up :)
Jangan marah ChikiDiq....

Labels: better, happiness, juju, mumu, rainbows

x junn Chocolate Love Scribbles 8:23 PM x

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Monday, October 25, 2010

Hello ladies!

I'm helping a closeclosefriend (yea, that close) of mine sell some of her pre-loved items away.

First up, this uber uber gorgeous charm bracelet from the elegant house of DIOR.
This exquisite piece is absolutely chic and bound to spice up whatever your fashionistic ensemble is for the day.

Condition 9.5/10
Looks almost brand new!
Chic price: S$200 (negotiable)

Now,who said watches ain't a requirement for everyday glam style?
Hey, even those perpetual late comers needs a watch!
(Since you're forever late, might as well arrive in style, riteeeee?)

Condition: 8/10 There are some scratches on the metal base but bcos it's at the bottom part of the wrist..no one can see it!

Chic price: $380

And yes....
last but not least...

No one.

Not one...man or lady can ever have too much bag (no way!)
So why not make this love your companion?
Measures 12 inches by 8 inches, arm drop 14 inches.
And...it's in noir.

Not even the nerdiest, dorkiest of human can ever, ever go wrong with a black bag.

Condition: 8/10

Chic price: QUOTE your own price!Isn't that js awesome!

Drop me a line at junn.jumahat@gmail.com if you are interested in any of these items ya (of course you are ;p) or if you need more pics.

Ps: In buying these items, you will be helping a devoted and absolutely nicest mom on earth to pool more funds for her 3 lovable and cute daughters! So play your part and let's make this world a better place!

Labels: bargains, funds, happy, love, pre-loved

x junn Chocolate Love Scribbles 5:19 AM x

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Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Healing.
I feel much better today.
Alhamdulillah.

I am so greatful for the love that I have from so many people...
Anchoring me...stopping me from falling further into a gaping abyss that js seem to love me for one reason or another...trying its best to lure me deeper....

Sometimes I wonder...
Am I the only one having these dismal thoughts in my head?
The frequent need to think and worry...
And to run away...........

Thank you though to Adda, Kakak, Nana...Eediq....
Thank you...for pulling me back..

I was also reading through our blog...and came across an entry that Shidiq wrote for me...
Sometime back in December last year...an excerpt goes something like this...

Face up to the sky, baby

And close your pretty eyes

Let's hold our hands together

For we will be there for each other.

You have been true to your word...
And have been there for me...eventhough...
At times...I have been awful..
Breaking my promises...and doing things I shouldn't do...
Yet you still forgive me time and again...
And for that...I will always be grateful to you..
For your kindness towards me....
And most importantly...your love.
I promise to be there for you should you ever fall like me.
And that is a promise I intend to keep.

Honestly, I don't know how long this serene feeling will last.
But i really hope it is here to stay.
For good.

Labels: being there, love, promises